When Our Worlds Turned Upside Down

We recently told you that we got lucky enough to meet on Tinder. We were texting each other for about two weeks when we finally had our first date at Else's favorite Thai restaurant in Cologne. We didn't make a reservation because the restaurant is often quite empty during the week. But not this time. So we decided to try a Burmese restaurant that both of us didn't know. (We were relieved when we realized that both of us need to use GoogleMaps to find places nearby.) The restaurant still has nostalgic values for us.

Eight days later, we went on our second date. (We can't believe that there was a time we voluntarily spent eight days without each other!) Ilse had never been to Cologne's Sculpture Park, an open air art gallery with new exhibitions every other year, so Else planned a date exploring the park and the area around it. It was just a week before carnival so she brought Berliners (filled pastry particularly popular during carnival) filled with egg liqueur. When Ilse smeared most of her filling across her cheeks, Else knew she'd found her person. We ended this fantastic day at our now favorite bar.

It took Ilse one more date and the planning of the next to have this 'my person' moment. (But she also had to battle her dislike of bangs during that time!) She loves potato croquettes, but in contrast to our childhoods, these are not as widely available in restaurants anymore as we wish they would be. So, after Ilse had planned a sunny outing to walk the river for our third date, Else found a place still serving potato croquettes for our fourth date. When she told Ilse, Ilse could finally accept Else's bangs. ;) That Else accidentally crushed some cheese during this date helped even more.

We are so glad that we found our clumsy half!

Comments

"You can't even have a child, dude."

Three weeks ago, we talked about virtual harassment and objectification where we also cited the sentence used as a title for this post. We are aware that this sentence was supposed to be an insult and that many same-sex couples would feel hurt. But: we don't. Both of us don't want kids. There was a time Ilse thought she would have children one day, but Else never really planned on it. So telling us that we can't have a child doesn't do anything to us. At least not directly. But it still maddens us. This intentionally hurtful comment is based upon the heteronormative supposition that every woman eventually wants to have at least one child. Most of us have been told that ‘we just don’t know it yet,’ that ‘we haven’t met the right person (man) yet,’ that ‘we will see that we really do want children eventually,’ and that ‘we will surely regret our decision one day.’ No. No. No. No. We are indeed capable of making this decision. We are able to know what we want. It’s not abo

Cochem: A Few Days in the German Countryside

Cochem is a place in the German countryside, in Rhineland-Palatinate. Although it is a district seat, it is rather small with about 5,000 inhabitants. Although it is probably easiest to arrive by car, traveling by rail is convenient as well. And as you know: we will always prefer to travel sustainably! We had booked a vacation home with a surprisingly comfortable Murphy bed (our first time in a Murphy bed!) and a little kitchen. Although Cochem had almost no COVID-19 cases when we visited, we nevertheless wanted to be careful and a place where we could make our own food was a perfect solution. But although it rained a lot, we luckily could enjoy a few patios. Cochem lies at the Moselle and is part of the Mosel wine region. The Mosel wines are amongst the best (if not the best) wines in Germany and the local/regional wines in Cochem were delicious. Since Cochem is a popular town for tourists and day visitors, there were lots of restaurants. But this popularity also meant that prices wer

Monthversary

We've been together for more than a year now, but we still celebrate our monthversaries — with one exception. Last month, both of us were wondering whether it was a noteworthy day. Ilse twisted her mind: whose birthday is it? Else checked her calendar for birthdays of her friends. At some point we talked about it: Ilse: "I have the feeling today is a special day. It might be a birthday, but I have no idea whose it could be." (Else made a suggestion that turned out to be correct, but it wasn't a birthday we would ever celebrate.) A few days later, we realized what we forgot: our monthversary! Ever since we talked about being a couple and settled on a date (it almost never is just one day, is it?), we try to make this day a special one: we make each other small — usually handmade — presents, prepare surprises and/or go to an extravagant (more or less ...) restaurant. We spent one of our favorite monthversaries at an Israeli restaurant on the eighth floor with f

Else & Ilse | LGBTIQ+ adventurers

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