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On Tinder?!

Both of us are rather traditional when it comes to dating and romantic relationships. But it isn't easy to meet the right woman—even in a city as queer as Cologne. So at some point, both of us decided to go for it: Tinder. (Else tried a few other apps solely for women but these didn't work at all: only a few women in our region were registered, even less seemed to be active—or interested.)

From the beginning, many of our prejudices were confirmed. Both of us matched with women, apparently single and looking to meet another woman, who then asked us if it would be okay if their husband/boyfriend/best friend would join or, probably our favorite, "only watch." We also enjoyed a lot: "and, um, by the way: I'm in a relationship. I'm actually looking for some extra fun. I hope that's okay with you." - "Um, no. It's not." We don't mind how others live their sexuality as long as everyone knows what they are getting into. But. We often did not know until a while into the conversation. And that's not okay.

We were fed up with these incidences. We often took a break from Tinder. Fortunately, both of us decided to give it one final shot before we would quit. Fortunately, we both swiped right—both of us kept confusing the right swiping direction (or super liked persons we did not want to super like—but that's a different story). And after sorting out messaging problems (we often did not get a notification for a new Tinder message), we finally made it to our first date!

So, in short: even the least promising dating app might let you find your person. Keep trying!

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