Else & Ilse | LGBTIQ+ adventurers

2020 has been difficult. We lost many people to the pandemic or to police brutality. Many of us lost friends and relatives, jobs, homes, livelihoods. And in a year like this one, it can be so difficult to see the good moments of life. Here are our favorite 2020 memories: In January, we spent a long weekend in Belgium . We saw dinosaurs in Brussels, took many walks in Bruges, and had fantastic food and drinks. In February, we went ice-skating—our first time as a couple, but both of us haven't done this often in general. We celebrated our first anniversary and ended the month with one of our favorite holidays: carnival! This was the last time we spent time in a crowd: we already knew that COVID-19 was a threat, but weren't aware of its severity yet. At the beginning of March, we attended an ArtNight and painted abstract vulvas with a colorful bunch of people. This also started our acrylic painting journey which would help us through the following months because in March and April...

Today is a very special day because it is Else's birthday! For me (Ilse) this is my favorite day of the year because I love surprising Else. I wish her birthday celebration could go on for days and weeks. Just make it an Else-year. I never thought that I would meet my soulmate on tinder when I started using the app about 2 years ago. Flash forward to November 9th 2020. Else is sitting next to me while I am writing this blog text. I never thought that I would be so happy in 2020. She makes me incredibly happy. She is the most caring and most funny person in the universe and she always manages to make me smile or laugh even when I'm in a really bad mood or even when the world seems to be going down. 2020 is a very challenging year for everyone. The pandemic is affecting the mood. It sometimes depresses me a lot and I start to worry or miss things so much. And then there is Else who never fails to cheer me up and to put me in a good mood. And now, more than ever, it is so importan...

We love movies with older people! They show that we can be happy when we are older and we love the idea of growing old together. And even if people don’t have anyone while growing old, it’s never too late to find someone. And, maybe most importantly, these movies star old(er) actors and particularly actresses who so often aren’t engaged anymore—even though they experienced so much in their lives. As actresses and as protagonists. Here are a few of our favorite movies: Something’s Gotta Give (2003) We love Diane Keaton! In this movie, her character continuously changes and develops. She is self-confident and comfortable in her body and her life. The movie illustrates that we can love and find love in every phase of our life. This movie tells a wonderfully amusing story about love later in life. The Leisure Seeker (2017) A movie about a married couple who spent their entire lives with each other—including all the ups and downs. To reminisce about their shared life, they go on their last ...

Yes! Of course we are friends. We are even best friends. We know almost everything about each other. We spend more time with each other than anyone else. We enjoy each other’s company. We talk for hours, we laugh about the most stupid jokes (and some good ones as well). We can be who we really are—in the joyful moments as well as in the sad or stressed ones. We live together.  But we are so much more than what you are assuming. We also sleep in the same bed. We love each other—not platonically, but romantically. We share more with each other than we would with friends—however close we are with them. When we are holding hands, we don’t do so as friends, but as partners and lovers. And we certainly don’t kiss each other as friends. So while we would appreciate when people would accept displays of affection as natural and shareable with everyone, this is probably not the reason why people think that we are not a couple. Presenting as rather femme, we are too easily mistaken as heteros...

"Soo ... You are lesbian now?" "What? Are you gay or straight?" "But you dated men before!” Most of us have experienced questions and exclamations like these. And although we understand that it is so much easier to put someone in a box, to have an unambiguous label, it’s not always so easy for the person who’s asked to label themselves. Both of us dated men before. Else always knew that she likes women as well; Ilse took a while longer to understand—although the signs were there. Naturally, people were and are confused. Lesbian? Bisexual? Pansexual? (Although that’s something no one ever asked us yet.) For quite a few years, Else didn’t label herself at all—it was what it was. Ilse, when she finally realized that she wants to be with women, didn’t label herself either. Both of us aren’t interested in men anymore, neither sexually, nor romantically. So at some point, we started to label ourselves as lesbian or homosexual. We also like the term queer since it ref...